Category Archives: Uncategorized

11.  Always order the expensive glass of wine. At 47, I can’t drink more than one without getting a headache. 10.  Arthritis.  It’s a real thing. 9.  Physical therapists are super heroes sans capes. 8.  Acne is still a thing. … Continue reading →

Arriving home from school is an adventure. When I press the garage door button, the dogs perk up, rush the laundry room door and bark “hello.” I back into the garage, shut off the Element and put the garage door … Continue reading →

ME: Standing in my driveway, holding a roadie that she cannot see since I’m talking to her on the phone.  She wouldn’t even know what a roadie was. STILL ME:  I can’t chat for long; I have to go to … Continue reading →

MOM:  Slow down. ME (unloading groceries from the car): What? MOM: Slow down. ME:  This is my speed. MOM: You and Jeff move too fast; it’s not healthy. ME (pausing): What? MOM: It’s not good. Moving that quickly is unhealthy. … Continue reading →

‘Twas the night before my first day of school, when all through the horde, all the creatures were stirring, chewing, and digging. Honey, in all her puppy cuteness, decided to dig while I sipped what I thought would be my … Continue reading →

The Newsroom RING TONE calls to me from my phone at 9:30 pm. MOM CELL (because she refuses to give up her landline and only calls me on her cell phone because my 435 area code is long distance) appears … Continue reading →

  MOM (holding Betty White on her lap in the car):  Do you have any idea how old she really is? ME:  Dixie thinks 20. We thought she was 15 when she came to live with me. MOM:  Well, I … Continue reading →

Most often, a MOM-versation makes me laugh — hard and for a really long time. Growing up, when I whined, “That’s not fair,” my dad asked, “Who said life was fair?” Now I believe that life grows increasingly less fair … Continue reading →

Loading four dogs into the Element with mom seemed like a good idea. After all, who wouldn’t want to go for a scenic ride down the canyon to play in her grass-filled backyard? Booker T. Washington Hooker sat on mom’s … Continue reading →