11. Always order the expensive glass of wine. At 47, I can’t drink more than one without getting a headache.
10. Arthritis. It’s a real thing.
9. Physical therapists are super heroes sans capes.
8. Acne is still a thing.
7. Being a size 2 is not still a thing.
6. Jeans are uncomfortable.
5. My body has developed an intolerance for things I love like ice cream, potato chips, and cheese.
4. Staying home is fabulous.
3. Coffee after 9:00 am keeps me awake.
2. While my waist gets bigger, my lips get thinner.
1. Sleeping makes me sweat.