The Man in the Orange Apron

Curious George has The Man in the Yellow Hat to help him navigate life in the big city. I have A Man in the Orange Apron to help me with everything from propane to rakes. My man lives in the Home Depot.

Like the motto of House Stark in Game of Thrones is “winter is coming.” Therefore, I started thinking about the snow blower. It needs gas mixed with oil.

Winter is coming this weekend. If I don’t get all of the snow off the driveway, it will ice up for the next five months.

So, I made a stop at the Home Depot.

After finding a man in an orange apron in the light bulb section. . .

Me:      (Holding a two-gallon red plastic gas can and a big bottle of 2-cycle oil.)   Pardon me. (I smiled.) Hello. Would you mind helping me?

The Man in the Orange Apron:       What do you need?

Me:      How do I unscrew the lid? (Yes, I knew how stupid I sounded.)

The Man in the Orange Apron: Ugh. These are the worst. Let me do it for you.

Me:      (Now, that’s what I’m talkin’ about. I don’t really want help. I want someone to do it for me.)

The Man in the Orange Apron: Press this tab, then twist.

Me:      (Nodding and feigning attentiveness.)

The Man in the Orange Apron: (Inserting the yellow nozzle.) When you fill, this presses down. It can’t leak unless this is pressed.

Me: (Still nodding as if I was tracking the details. But, thinking, “stick it in and pour, right?”) Now, what do I do with this? (I held out the bottle of oil.)

The Man in the Orange Apron: Don’t you have a man at home to do this?

Me: (Smiling.) No. (If there was a man in my home, do you think I’d be here, with you, my Man in the Orange Apron?)

The Man in the Orange Apron: You don’t need this much. You just need the little bottle. Follow me. I’ll show you.